Good morning Cher

( that is a lovely name btw. I remember seeing, some time ago, the movie The Big Easy. Dennis Quaid, the hot lead actor rolled the name CHER off his tongue in the most seductive way…)

A lovely memory and positive energy as I write a comment on your excellent article.

I think you are extremely brave to write about your experiences . I am so impressed to read about your journey to learn and grow from those breadcrumbs.

Bravo. You will find and solve everything you seek. I just know it. Your self analysis, focus and action will deliver.

This passage in your post is one of many that caught my eye: The other part just went along trying to please him.

It caused me to think of all the current articles about high school age girls and boys. The boys learning that internet porn is reality sex . The girls believing that the boys will expect them to perform like the porn star. The gal performing that role the best: well…she gets the guy…

I actually think it’s getting better with GenZ-ers. Girls are,much earlier, expressing their own needs in the sex equation. Yet I don’t know this for a fact.

What I do know( and you know and most of us know) is that the loving, respectful, emotionally and physically rewarding relationship that we all crave from a significant other comes about from mutual and equal “pleasing”. Beginning ones sexual and/or relationship life as a “faker” in order to please…not good… because this only results in longer term trauma and heartache.

P.S. thank you for the earlier claps you sent my way