Fabulous essay. Everything needed saying. I have personally experienced so much of what you describe, Felicia.

Part of me wants to say the number of women doing what they do to other women is the perfect example of the effectiveness of century old gaslighting.

When one stops for a moment and thinks about the messaging implanted in women, it is an Ah-ha moment. But that also sounds a bit, or a lot, like I am excusing the behaviour you describe. I’m not.

Addressing this elephant is a giant leap toward fixing the problem and fostering a truthful rather than pretend “ we are in this together.” It’s time more of us ( I include myself) take a deep breath, smash the “ shhhh, don’t rock the boat” boundaries and promote these needed conversations.